[Private to Near] I think it's a matter of you wanting him to want you in the same way as you Well. Yes. I suppose I do. Doesn't everyone? I can't think of many things worse than being the one doing all the giving in the relationship.
I think his attitude to people and romance and sex and life in general might be very different to yours Yes, I know they are. He's got a very different perspective on nearly everything. I used to think it was just an American thing, but none of the Americans I've met recently are like that, so I suppose it's just him.
I have no questions about his attraction. I'm aware of his attraction. I suppose what I want most is reassurance that's not all there is. What frightens me about this is that I don't want to be with him like my other relationships with men: I don't want to be casual. Feeling like this is very unsettling. I don't know what to do with myself any more than I know what to do with him.
I've said before--and I can't recall to whom at the moment, if it was you or Lorne or someone else--that I don't want to be a toy for him, I don't want to be a bit on the side. Wanting that worries me; being willing to settle for it worries me; my complete inability to act on any of this worries me.
How much influence do you think you'd have about how it goes I'm convinced nothing is going to happen without my okay.
and if it went the way you wanted it to, would things be able to go back to normal afterwards if you decided to leave it at that? I'm capable of setting aside my emotions for the workday. The rest of the time is the real question.
[ooc: Network TV used to work like this: the season starts around September/October (sometimes as late as November) and runs until May, with weeks off around the major holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas/New Year's, Easter.) for a total of 24 episodes. The most important months are November, February and May, because those are sweeps: when advertising rates are set, so shows do their stunt casting or big events in order to get more viewers and be able to demand more money for commercial time.
Now, though, with cable and summer seasons making more and more of an impact, the old system is getting swept aside more and more: for example, 24 not starting until January this year so they could do the entire season with no breaks or repeats.
So I kind of understand the reasoning behind putting the new season off until next year, but it's still frustrating to wait. But at least there won't be six weeks between new episodes like there have been in the past. I've been spoiled by all the British TV I've been watching: I want it all now now now!
Jack is so not the relationship type. When they introduced him in series 1 of the new Who the Doctor explained it as "he's a 51st century man--so many species, so little time."
Ianto's going to get his heart broken no matter what happens, I suspect. *cuddles my boy*]
no subject
I think it's a matter of you wanting him to want you in the same way as you
Well. Yes. I suppose I do. Doesn't everyone? I can't think of many things worse than being the one doing all the giving in the relationship.
I think his attitude to people and romance and sex and life in general might be very different to yours
Yes, I know they are. He's got a very different perspective on nearly everything. I used to think it was just an American thing, but none of the Americans I've met recently are like that, so I suppose it's just him.
I have no questions about his attraction. I'm aware of his attraction. I suppose what I want most is reassurance that's not all there is. What frightens me about this is that I don't want to be with him like my other relationships with men: I don't want to be casual. Feeling like this is very unsettling. I don't know what to do with myself any more than I know what to do with him.
I've said before--and I can't recall to whom at the moment, if it was you or Lorne or someone else--that I don't want to be a toy for him, I don't want to be a bit on the side. Wanting that worries me; being willing to settle for it worries me; my complete inability to act on any of this worries me.
How much influence do you think you'd have about how it goes
I'm convinced nothing is going to happen without my okay.
and if it went the way you wanted it to, would things be able to go back to normal afterwards if you decided to leave it at that?
I'm capable of setting aside my emotions for the workday. The rest of the time is the real question.
[ooc: Network TV used to work like this: the season starts around September/October (sometimes as late as November) and runs until May, with weeks off around the major holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas/New Year's, Easter.) for a total of 24 episodes. The most important months are November, February and May, because those are sweeps: when advertising rates are set, so shows do their stunt casting or big events in order to get more viewers and be able to demand more money for commercial time.
Now, though, with cable and summer seasons making more and more of an impact, the old system is getting swept aside more and more: for example, 24 not starting until January this year so they could do the entire season with no breaks or repeats.
So I kind of understand the reasoning behind putting the new season off until next year, but it's still frustrating to wait. But at least there won't be six weeks between new episodes like there have been in the past. I've been spoiled by all the British TV I've been watching: I want it all now now now!
Jack is so not the relationship type. When they introduced him in series 1 of the new Who the Doctor explained it as "he's a 51st century man--so many species, so little time."
Ianto's going to get his heart broken no matter what happens, I suspect. *cuddles my boy*]