likesthecoat | Bute Park, Cardiff

He closes his eyes. She's trying to make it better, he knows this, but he's a man accustomed to dealing with logic. "If I just showed up they'd arrest me, at the very least. If it's so classified Lorne couldn't even tell me--well, anything, really, us just showing up would probably get us killed."

Martha sighs and relaxes back away from Ianto, thinking that maybe he needed some time on his own.

"John said they get leave, he just has never taken his... Maybe, maybe Lorne will be able to use his."

[ooc: omg, did we break him?

"Then what's it going to take?" Ianto says quietly. "What's he waiting for?"

[ooc: . . . maybe just a bit.]

Martha picked at the edge of the blanket, pulling at a loose thread.

"John said they were in the middle of a war, maybe he needs to wait until there is a lull and he can get out?"

[ooc: oh, poor woobie]

He leans his head on his hands. "God, Martha, what am I doing?"

"You didn't know, it's not like we can always control who we're attracted to."

Martha sighs and begins to wish maybe she had lied and said something else, to at least keep Ianto's spirit up if nothing else.

"... I think we may definitely need that ice cream tonight love," she says softly.

He chuckles dryly. "I promised you ice cream and chick flicks, yeah? And it'll get my mind off the fact that my boyfriend is 2.7 million light years away."

Martha sighed and pulled Ianto in for another chaste kiss to his temple, smiling sadly.

"I understand love. I'm sorry about this..." she sighs and hugs him again because she's at a loss for anything else to do.

"it does make you feel a bit powerless when you realie how far away they are doesn't it?"

"I already felt powerless. Now I feel a bit hopeless, too. They're so far away and fighting fuckin' aliens."

"Don't give up hope Ianto, if Lorne feels the same way about you too, than thats all you two have at the moment. But, I've seen you two interact, there's something there that shouldn't be given up on."

"I know," he says softly. "I know it's . . . special. But what's the point of it, yeah? If we're never actually going to be together?"

"Maybe you will. Maybe he'll think he doesn't want to shoot aliens anymore and misses Earth, maybe he'll have their boss recruit you to work with them-- I don't know. But if you love him, don't give up on him now."

Ianto nods and sighs, and then smiles at her--with effort. "I'm not giving up."

It's too good, too sweet, too full of promise.

He says, "Should I tell him I know, do you think?"

"Now that, I have no idea. John told me what galaxy they were in one night after I had mentioned some of the places I had been. He said he felt like he owed me something in return.

He didn't mean to tell me exactly where they were, that one sort of slipped out. So, I don't know. I don't know Lorne well enough to know how he would take you knowing and his CO letting it slip.

But then, I suppose it would be nice to be honest with him so neither of you has to pretend otherwise..."

"Honesty is always best . . . we're just so used to saying 'that's classified' to each other." He sighs. "At some point of my life I'd really like a relationship that's simple."

"I think those terms are in direct contrast with one another Ianto," Martha admitted, smiling softly and taking Ianto's hand.

"So, what are you going to do love? You love Lorne? But what about... what was it, J?"

"Yeah. Seems that way.

"I don't know what I'm going to do." He sighs again, heavily. "J . . . is friends with benefits, mostly. Which isn't to say there's not complications, too."

"I wish I could do something..." Martha sighs and picks blade off grass, bending it over in her fingers.

"I know I can't, but I hate to see my friends so..." Martha sighed and leaned over, resting her head on Ianto's shoulder.

Ianto puts an arm around her and gives her a gentle squeeze. "I'm just not very good at love.

"You know, when I got together with Ja--with J, I thought, this is perfect, no expectations, no strings, we just have sex when we want to and it's simple. And then Lorne came along and it all got tangled again."

Martha leaned in to Ianto, resting her head on his shoulders, "I don't know you as well as some, but you strike me as the kind of person that feels rather passionately about people. I guess I just don't see you in an aloof sort of relationship..."

"I wouldn't say it's aloof. It's just not love."

He's fairly certain it's not.

Except when it's two a.m. and all he wants is Jack . . . or he has Jack and feels he doesn't want anything more.

Martha closes her eyes and thinks about Ianto's situation, one that he didn't know he was in until he was neck deep.

"So you don't feel anything for J? Outside the bonds of friendship and lust of course..."

"I feel a great many things for J," Ianto says. "I just try not to think about it much."

"I think you should take both your lovers and move to a castle in the welsh countryside and the three of you spend your days and nights shagging and perhaps growing ...whatever it is that grows out here."

He smiles to himself. "Sheep, mostly.

"Though that does sound like an ideal plan."

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