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Edit: Sam, everything I say here still stands. I'm glad to see you're all right.

That first night Sam visited me we went to one of my favorite pubs, where the staff loved him for trying to speak Welsh (emphasis on trying) and any number of girls tried to chat him up, and we both drank too much and he giggled at me quite a bit.

(There was also some indiscriminate kissing. On my part.)

He was a big, silly, clever, brilliant man and it hurts to think of never speaking to him again. Edit: Thank God that's no longer an issue.


I miss Lorne so much my body aches.



I'm taking the train to Swansea later, to fetch my car from my parents and spend the weekend with somebody who'll coddle me. It's hard to say who's more disappointed right now, them or me. They thought I was finally moving on from losing Lisa; I thought I was starting a new life. I think I have moved on, but not in a way I can really explain to them.

At least I'll be seeing Martha later. Perhaps Jack as well.