Ianto Jones

[Private Entry]

Everybody is mad about this Saxon bloke. I don't see it. He's charismatic, I suppose, but I can't figure out where he actually stands on any policies. The EU, racial issues, London's attitudes towards Wales, immigration . . . it's like he just smiles and makes hand puppets whenever reporters ask him questions, and everyone just smiles and applauds.

It's very strange.

Oh well. People will surely see through it by election day.

And what does it say about me that I'd rather talk about politics to myself than figure out how to fix things with Lorne? I don't know what to say about Lorne. We came closer to breaking up than I care to be again, but until we can find a way to be . . . I don't know, more open with each other, we probably will get there again.

I'm excited to see Atlantis. I'm excited to take part in this project. But most of all I want to be with him. Isn't that enough for him? Why isn't that enough?

As for Jack . . . Jack, Jack, Jack. What I feel for him doesn't matter anymore, does it? Even if I could figure it out, he's gone. If I love him, that's not going to bring him back.

I suppose the important thing is to never make Lorne feel like a consolation prize. I've never felt like I was settling or making do. I don't how to convince him of this other than showing him and telling him, but if even then he doesn't believe me . . .

Maybe retcon is the best thing to do. Take Jack out of my memory completely. Then Lorne won't feel he's in competition with anyone anymore.